Chapter 32
1592words
Fuck!
Fucking hell!
I punch the wall in my bedroom countless times until I see blood stain it.I don't even feel the burn in my bruised knuckles
"She chose him. She fucking chose him over me."
I whisper and pummel my fist into the wall for the last time.
I've tried everything, everything to use as an outlet for these emotions but there's zero to fucking nothing.
The scene that happened in front of me was my worst fucking nightmare, still is because I can see it replaying every fucking time.
I jog down the steps and grab a bottle of whiskey placing it on the table, I brace my hands on the wood and hang my head between my shoulder blade swinging my body back and forth slowly,I lift my head and stare at the bottle for three good minutes. Well,fuck it.
I open it and rapidly drink directly from it without stopping until it's half finished, I want the burn,I want the pain. I wince at the last minute. I repeat the same procedure until it's completely finished.
"Well..." I cock my head to the side .
How about we try vodka
I grab a bottle of vodka and on the first gulp I hiss
Shit. This is too strong,what the hell is it? I lift the bottle to read but everything is so fucking blurry. I blink and the bottle slips from my fingers crashing to the floor and shattering into tiny pieces. Shit! I crouch and start picking them only to get cut
Fuck!
"What-" my mom opens the door and pauses,she takes in the entire scene and then rushes to me
"Son. What are you doing?" She pulls me up by the arm.
"Brandon. Please don't tell me you finished these bottles all by yourself."
"One and a half mom,not all of them."
"Still,are you trying to kill yourself?"
"Maybe if I do she'll change her mind and pick me too."
She can barely hold me up because I'm damn heavy.
"Let's get you to bed."
She drags me out of the cellar and I throw myself on the bed. She's mumbling something but I'm too exhausted to focus, my eyes start to shut and I give in to the darkness.
KIMBERLY
for the past one week I've been zoning out. I don't want to do anything productive and I don't want to leave the house either but my mum would rather die than see me destroying my own future and life.
When she saw the tears on my face and my puffy eyes,she held me and told me whenever I'm ready,she's there to listen.
I cried the whole night in her arms.
I still refused to talk about it but today, I want to get rid of that permanent worry etched on her face because of me.
I heard her sniffing in her bedroom,she probably thinks Bran broke my heart when it's the exact opposite. I didn't have a choice,I couldn't just let Ronan hurt himself, Brandon and I started off in the wrong way and maybe,just maybe,it wasn't meant to be after all.
A week later
"I'm glad I have you back, I missed you so much."
Ronan slides a strap of my dress off my shoulder and kisses me there. My body goes cold.
"Ronan.."
"Shhhh. Let me show you how much you mean to me."
He whispers and stares at me with pleading eyes, the same eyes I saw after he nearly drowned.
I try hard to stop it but he pushes me down on the bed and crawls on top of me
"Ronan, I can't. Not tonight."
He pauses
"You don't feel the same way? You don't want to be with me right?"
His words have a clipped edge and it scares me,what if he attempts to--to hurt, No.
I rub his cheek.
"It's not that."
"Then what?"
I open my mouth but no words come out
"I won't hurt you Kim, please trust me."
Before I can protest he kisses me and starts moving my dress up, I grab at the material and he whispers against my lips
"Relax."
He pull on it harder and then pulls my panties down. He won't stop,maybe if I let go it'll be done as soon as . I should just get it over with.
He rubs my clit thrice and then grabs his dick, I shake my head
"Condom."
He looks at me for a few beats
"You don't trust me?"
No, I don't. The only person I'll ever give that part of me is Bran and Bran alone but I don't tell him that unless I want to initiate world war four.
"Let's just be cautious okay."
He looks like he wants to object so I shake my head
"I'm not on the pill."
Lie.
He grabs a condom and rolls it on and then thrusts inside me.
He kisses me,my neck and sucks on my tits but I don't feel anything,bile rises in my throat and I control myself as much as I can. He spins me around to lie on my stomach while he moves in and out from on top of my backside.
I close my eyes praying for it to be over. The bed squeaks and mixes with his grunts of pleasure. In a few minutes he comes and slides out of me. He lies on his back and covers his eyes with his arm,
"Fuck that was awesome."
I turn on my side facing away from him, pulling the sheet over my body.
I feel him move,he places a kiss on my bare shoulder and I squeeze my eyes shut so tightly.
"I'm glad you enjoyed it."
He says and places a kiss there again and then his heat is gone. Tears flow from my eyes and I don't bother wiping them.
"I can't wait for the game to start I'm so nervous." Sam squeaks
"Kim!"
"Huh?"
"Are you zoning out again?"
"No. I'm just nervous."
"Don't worry, we'll kill this shit."
She jumps in her cheerleading outfit looking hot as fuck.
My best friend is one of the most gorgeous girls on the squad which is why she has no problem in that department,they need her to pull in the football team,as for me...I can't say the same.
The teams run onto the field and the crowd goes wild.
The game starts and we loose the few first rounds.
And then the wins start coming
The crowd is very quiet,it's like we're all holding our breaths. The sound of thumps and oohs and ahhs start the more the game becomes heated.
There's a good pass from Michael to Xander,he runs with the ball,he's unstoppable and fast as he passes the ball to non other that Brandon. He runs with the ball and our entire school stands on their feet holding their breaths, eyes wide and hands either on top of their heads or covering their mouths.
In slow motion,which I bet everyone is viewing from. Bran runs towards the line with full speed crossing it to the end zone.
Silence.
Silence
And then the crowd goes wild! The adrenaline rush from our school students goes higher.
"We won Kim! We won!"
Sam jumps up and down screaming
I join in because well shit!
"Yesssss! We won!"
Jonathan jumps on Bran sending them both to the ground,all the guys form a heap on top on him, everyone except Ron who throws his head back and keeps whistling,fist pumping in the air.
"Tigers!"
"Tigers!"
"Tigers!" People chant
"Man that was fun!" Xan grins from ear to ear
It's a celebration party and everyone is privileged to join
"I knew we'd win." Sam smiles
"Come here." Xan leans forward and pulls her by the fingers.
Sam's stunned face is priceless,
Xander is NOT the type of guy who holds hands or looks at girls twice,he hits and it's done,which has me on edge because what if he sleeps with Sam and then breaks her heart? but Sam is smart...right?
He pulls her between his legs and brushes her lips with his thumb
"You looked so hot in that outfit back there baby."
A deep shade of red creeps up her neck to her cheeks
"How come he gets the good one." Lenny whines
"I'm getting a bonner just by looking at these two. Are you fucking already?"
Sam's eyes widen and Xan chuckles
"Jonathan." I smack him upside the head.
She tries to step back but he pulls her by the waist locking her to him
She gasps and he takes advantage by slamming his lips on hers, geez. Is he trying to swallow her whole?
"Guys! Get a room."
Sam smiles and Xan pulls away,he turns her around tucking her safely between his legs and wrapping his hands around her waist from behind.
I smile through the rim of my cup and when her eyes find mine she widens hers in a "don't you dare" way.
I'm washing my hands when the door clicks shut. I don't pay it much thought as I pat my cheeks,it's the ladies bathroom after all.
I look up in the mirror and find Naomi standing behind me,I keep wiping my hands while we both maintain eye contact.
"Hi Kimberly."
She says after a minute of silence
I turn
"What can I help you with Naomi?"
I'm sick and tired of all the drama, I'm exhausted already and I need peace.
"I just want to say I'm sorry."
I'm taken by surprise
"Sorry?"
