Chapter 53
1236words
It's been a while since Brandon and I spoke properly, maybe I should have a talk with him, it's time we sat down and had a proper conversation without the yelling. Since it's a Friday, the girls and i agreed to skip movie night and join the guys at the bar instead.
I open messages and type one to Jonathan.
Me: Is he going to be there?
I nervously wait for his reply which comes after five minutes.
Jonathan: Yes, he is.
I suck in a deep breath and type another one before I throw the phone on the bed.
Me: Don't tell him I asked.
We head out and get in Nao's car, the one her boyfriend, Nate, bought for her on her nineteenth birthday.
The Lexus engine purs to life and I lean back in the leather seat, thinking about the many ways things can either go right or left tonight.
I check my phone and read the message Jonathan sent.
Jonathan: No problem, I won't.
I need to get everything off my chest, I just need to be calm and get it over with.
We enter the bar and it doesn't take us long to spot the guys in the VIP area. We take a seat and when his voice speaks from behind me, my whole body goes rigid.
"Yeah, I'll look into it as soon as I can."
He's on the phone but when makes his way around the table and his eyes meet mine, the world suddenly stops.
My phone vibrates and a message from Matt flashes on the screen, pulling me out of the trance, I open it.
Matt: You look amazingly hot.
Me: stalker? *Side eyes emoji*
Matt: I can't help it, it's not like I can come over there with all those guys who would rip my head off.
I smile and slide the phone into the pocket of my hoodie.
About an hour later, I'm tipsy and the courage I didn't feel before bursts inside my bloodstream, I pull out my phone and text Bran.
Me: Can we talk in private?
I feel his eyes on me, so I look up and for sure, he's looking right at me. His eyes fixate back on the phone again and a message pops up on mine.
Bran: Right after you.
I tell Sam I'll be back soon and stand, making my way through the hall to the private rooms at the back. A few seconds later, Brandon walks in and clicks the door shut.
I turn around and face him.
"Hey," he says, keeping a distance.
"Hi," I can't look at him for long, so I walk to the bed and take a seat at the edge.
He walks to the corner and leans against the wall.
"How've you been?" He asks.
"I've been okay," I just shrug. "You?"
When he doesn't answer, my eyes lift and I find him watching me.
"Good," he finally answers. "But not the same without you."
I swallow and my tongue suddenly feels heavy to allow me to speak, at this point, I can't even look away from him.
"I've been staying at the guy's house."
My eyes move to his chest for a second then back to his face.
"The apartment feels different without you."
"Oh," I whisper. When there's silence again, I stand and place my hands in the back pockets of my jeans.
I always seem to be doing that lately, when I'm trying to pick the right words to say.
"Brandon, look." I sigh. "I know this whole thing is hard for you too, Marisa, that's a huge part of your life i can't erase no matter how much i would want to."
I take in a deep breath through the mouth.
"But if she's going to be a constant presence in your present then I don't think-"
Before I can finish my statement, he's already in front of me, placing his hand on my jaw and his thumb brushing my lips.
"Don't finish that sentence, don't do it because you know that the only woman I ever want to be constant in my present and future is you."
He searches my eyes. I place my hand on his wrist with the intention of sliding it off my face but I find myself keeping it in place. The feeling of his skin on mind burns my whole body like a hot volcano. His touch burns my skin back to life.
"You don't know how hard it's been to not be able to touch you like this."
"Brandon.."
"Don't tell me you don't feel the same , because I know that's a lie, you can't breathe properly as much as I can't without you. I know I should have told you about Marisa, about the trip to San Diego. I fucked up, I shouldn't have lied to you and I promise I'll never do it again."
We search each others eyes and all I want to do is hold him tight.
"I shouldn't have acted like that, I should have heard you out."
"You don't have to apologise, I warranted that reaction the moment I started communicating with Marisa, i should have just ignored her."
His eyes trace every part of my face, then land back on my eyes.
"I would never cheat on you, you know that, right? Please tell me you believe I'd never do that to you."
My lips slightly part as I stare at him waiting for my response.
"I do."
He looks like he just released a breath he was holding.
His lips come down on mine and electricity zips through me, I place my hand at the back of his neck and kiss him back, it's slow, it's patient and it's a reminder that we can get through anything life throws at us, as long as we love and trust each other.
We pull apart, breathing heavily as our foreheads rest against each other.
"I missed you," he whispers and captures my lips with his again and says between kisses. "So much." Then he deepens the kiss. When we pull apart again, I say the words back to him.
"I missed you too, so much." I briefly close my eyes before I say the next words. "But I can't come back to the apartment."
"Why not?" He frowns.
"I don't know, with the girls and I staying together, it's just made me rethink..."
My eyes meet his patient ones.
"What if, maybe we shouldn't stay together for now? you can move in with the guys and I can move in with the girls."
When he just stares at me without saying anything, I continue.
"This has nothing to do with our argument, I just feel like it's the right thing to do."
And just like that, his touch is gone.
"I think It has everything to do with that."
"Brandon,"
"What's next? Doubts about our engagement? About us?"
"No." I answer, a frown tugging at my brows.
"Well I think that's the road we're heading down to."
"It's not like that, why would you even say that?"
"We should go back."
"Brandon.."
Before I can say anything else, he's already at the door, so I just follow him out.
We make our way back to the VIP lounging room and something tells me this is just the beginning of more problems and arguments.
